Gnome News is Good News

I'll start by introducing myself. My name in Gnomish when transfered to English is Clive, but I like to tell people it is in tribute to the great British actor Clive Owen. One thing you should know about ALL Gnomes, we like to tell tall tales on occassion. I started telling the "Clive Owen" is my namesake story as a way to engage pretty lasses in pubs. It was an easy tale to tell, because as you can see by the pictures I post, we are very similar in appearance. I've been told this a lot by people, that we are twins practically. More so in my younger years than now, but for 238 years old, I can still turn a few heads. You see, what both Mr. Owen and I possess is called animal magnetism. We both have rugged chiseled good looks and are both jaw-dropping handsome, or I am so told by my numerous female admirers. (blush). But the similarities end there. We sound nothing alike. He is of course English, while I've got a plain Midwestern accent. I know you were imagining a gaelic or an Irish sounding "They're always after me lucky charms" accent, so I'm sorry to disappoint you. I am an Illinois corn-fed Gnome King.

OK, I'm not technically the King, but I am in line for the throne. Only 86 relatives stand in the way of me taking hold of that septor and stepping in as ruler. I am a Gnome King without a Kingdom. It's not really the throne I want, at least not as much as the title. You see, with the title of King, there are obvious perks. For starters, box seats at the United Center. Or being able to show up at any restaurant without a reservation... now that would be sweet.

But until then, I've decided to spend my free time living the life of a Gnome...thereby giving you a peek into my life. I bet you're entralled and maybe even a bit intrigued at the prospect of living vicariously through me. Are you breathless with An...... ticipation? I am. So stay tuned and as I live the next year of my life, I will be journaling on my "blog" to show you the highs and lows of life as Gnome King Clive.

In my next post I'll tell you a little more about myself including my likes (cheese) and dislikes (Keebler elves) and my preparations for Christmas. So flag this blog and come back soon.

Clive the Gnome King